My New Battle Wound!

Yesterday I added a new doctor to my growing list(dermatology surgeon) and a new battle wound to my growing stomach..lol  But seriously, the surgery went as well as expected, they did a very small wide excision about 2inches in length and 8-10 stitches in total. The worst pain was the multiple and I mean multiple local anesthesia needle pokes, after that I didn't really feel much. I think my mom was in more pain than I was... thats how I know how much she truly loves me. And even though we like to joke around with her about the amount of questions she asks my doctors and how overprotective she can sometimes be, I seriously would be lost without her. She has never ever left my side through any of this. She is the strongest person I know and I hope one day that I will have the chance to be at least half the mother she is!!


Last night I had a lot of pain and extreme itchiness but today I am feeling much better, just a bit sore. But I have been in good hands, thanks Joe for helping me yet again! I also plan to be back at work with the little ones tomorrow. I just have to be very cautious, the "lil people" like to hug and hang on me a bit, but I think they will be good about it. 


I should get the results from the new biopsy in about a week but Dr. is very hopeful that they will come back all clear!! So now I just continue on with my crazy great life, with my cool new scar and keep hoping that this will be my last. But since is more likely than not, that I will continue to add 'battles' upon my skin, I will embrace them all as a symbol that I am a fighter.. because, "every scar I have makes me who I am."

I wanted to say thank you to all of you who read my last post and called or messaged me to tell me that you have made your dermatology appts. Especially someone very near and dear.. You make me very happy : )

My phone rang..

So you know that dreaded dermatology call that I was hoping wouldn't come.. Well it did. On Tuesday at work I saw the missed call from Sloan and knew this would not be good news. At lunchtime I was able to listen to the voicemail and I heard nurse May, in a very cheery voice, say that I need to call the office as soon as possible, my heart just dropped.


When I was finally able to call back she said that one of the moles on my stomach came back abnormal, pre-cancerous. I was like ok so it NOT melanoma its not cancer. I can handle this.
Then she said well we think it is all pre-cancerous but I need to have another minor surgery ASAP to go in a little deeper to make sure that they got it all out and all of the margins are clear. At this point I honestly didn't know how to feel. I was glad that we hopefully caught it in time but I was still upset.


I was upset because I have heard this before, that we caught it in time and it will be nothing to worry about. 
I was upset because my stomach had just finally begun healing from the first biopsy, and I wanted very much to start working out again and feel better about myself.
I was upset because this meant yet again more time off of work. 
I was upset that I was even upset because I know so many people struggling with news far worse than mine.


And finally I was upset because.. and this was the toughest one.. 
This mole is PRE-cancerous because I caught it in time. I knew what to look for, I knew to go to the dermatologist right away, I knew what melanoma can do if left untreated.


I JUST ONLY WISH I KNEW ALL OF THIS BEFORE MY MELANOMA SPREAD.. and then the What If's started coming back into my mind. What if I caught my first mole in time....


Please, please, please.. Anyone who is reading this, anyone who knows me, and especially anyone who truly cares about me. GO GET YOUR SKIN CHECKED!! 


Don't wait for your what if's...


My surgery is scheduled for this coming Wednesday. I unfortunately won't know how deep they have to go until the day of when the dermatology Surgeon is able to look at it and get more pictures. Of course I am hoping that it won't be so bad, a couple of new stitches, a new small battle wound, and I'll be back to work in a day or so ready to teach some little ones : ) Prayers are always welcome.
Also if you can keep in your prayers a friend of mine's brother, Rob, and their family. They are all going through a very tough time and need all the positive thoughts and prayers they can get!! THANK YOU I love you ALL!!

Dr. Cutie

Sorry I have to start most of my recent blogs with, "I'm sorry I haven't written in awhile," but life does sneak up on you! Especially since its the 'teacher dreaded' report card time.. ugh But I did want to fill you all in on what's been going on in my journey. 


On Monday I took off of work to head back to Sloan for blood work and Dermo appt. Usually I don't mind going to my dermatologist because he is kind of on the HOT side..lol but this visit I had quite a few strange moles that I wanted him to look at so I was a bit anxious. After looking them all over in great detail he decided to remove two of them on my stomach that were dark in color, one of them almost had a purplish tint. These were the first moles that I had removed on my stomach and they were also the first ones that involved stitches, excluding my melanoma site of course. Well let me just say that stitches on both sides of your stomach is a bit painful. I never realized how much you truly use your stomach muscles. 


Today I am finally feeling a lot better but its honestly not the pain that bothers me.. its the waiting! Waiting for the results of the biopsies is the truly difficult part. I would say that I am anxiously awaiting his call but with Dr. Cutie its the opposite, since they only call if there is something they are concerned about, I am anxiously waiting for my phone to stay silent! 


I do have some good news to share.. at the end of the month, March 31st to be exact, is my one year Cancer-versary! Its funny because in a way im like..Wow I can't believe it has been a year already.. but on the other hand, I feel as if I can't remember my life without Cancer. Either way for me it's a milestone and I definitely want to do something memorable to celebrate so I decided to get a new tattoo! Yes Mom I am getting it, sorry I love you but this is something I really want to do. So in a few weeks I will be getting it done at the Wooster Social Club(yup from the show NY Ink). Its a little more pricey but heck after the year I have been through I deserve it : )-


And on exciting news.. wedding planning has been going pretty well.. We have the date, place, church, photo/video peeps and I got my dress!! Everyone hated it but me, so in other words it's PERFECT! 
Wedding date is going to be January 19th, 2013.. My own winter wonderland.. SO excited.


BUT now that all the semi-fun planning is done (aka the dress), I am taking applications for someone to plan all the REST...no experience needed!


Well everyone thanks for reading, have a wonderful and safe St. Patty's Day.