My phone rang..

So you know that dreaded dermatology call that I was hoping wouldn't come.. Well it did. On Tuesday at work I saw the missed call from Sloan and knew this would not be good news. At lunchtime I was able to listen to the voicemail and I heard nurse May, in a very cheery voice, say that I need to call the office as soon as possible, my heart just dropped.


When I was finally able to call back she said that one of the moles on my stomach came back abnormal, pre-cancerous. I was like ok so it NOT melanoma its not cancer. I can handle this.
Then she said well we think it is all pre-cancerous but I need to have another minor surgery ASAP to go in a little deeper to make sure that they got it all out and all of the margins are clear. At this point I honestly didn't know how to feel. I was glad that we hopefully caught it in time but I was still upset.


I was upset because I have heard this before, that we caught it in time and it will be nothing to worry about. 
I was upset because my stomach had just finally begun healing from the first biopsy, and I wanted very much to start working out again and feel better about myself.
I was upset because this meant yet again more time off of work. 
I was upset that I was even upset because I know so many people struggling with news far worse than mine.


And finally I was upset because.. and this was the toughest one.. 
This mole is PRE-cancerous because I caught it in time. I knew what to look for, I knew to go to the dermatologist right away, I knew what melanoma can do if left untreated.


I JUST ONLY WISH I KNEW ALL OF THIS BEFORE MY MELANOMA SPREAD.. and then the What If's started coming back into my mind. What if I caught my first mole in time....


Please, please, please.. Anyone who is reading this, anyone who knows me, and especially anyone who truly cares about me. GO GET YOUR SKIN CHECKED!! 


Don't wait for your what if's...


My surgery is scheduled for this coming Wednesday. I unfortunately won't know how deep they have to go until the day of when the dermatology Surgeon is able to look at it and get more pictures. Of course I am hoping that it won't be so bad, a couple of new stitches, a new small battle wound, and I'll be back to work in a day or so ready to teach some little ones : ) Prayers are always welcome.
Also if you can keep in your prayers a friend of mine's brother, Rob, and their family. They are all going through a very tough time and need all the positive thoughts and prayers they can get!! THANK YOU I love you ALL!!