The four letter word...

Sorry I sort of fell off a bit with writing, I haven't been feeling so well these last few weeks. But finally getting some of my energy back and thought I would take advantage with a blog update...
Ok so I left off on Month 7 - October

This month for me was very very special.. I have mentioned a few times that I have wonderful boyfriend but I am not sure that I talked about why he is so wonderful. Joe and I started dating at the end of October of last year.. now not going into too much detail but I have been through a lot of ups and downs in my past relationships and when we met I really wasn't looking to get into another one, but as you can see he won me over. And the day I knew he was "the one" was unfortunately the day I was diagnosed with Melanoma. I have talked about all the terrible things that this disease has brought into my life but the kindness and compassion I have received(and DO receive) from others continues to be my shining light, and Joe just happened to shine one of the brightest. He has truly shown me how to love and be loved unconditionally..
As I have stated before Joe and I had only been dating for around 4 months when I was diagnosed, we were just beginning to get to know each other when the person that I was, good or bad, would be changed forever. I can honestly say I am not the same Julie I was before cancer, then my biggest worry was...hmm I cant even think of a worry worth mentioning, now that I guess I have seen what real worry is all about.. those of you who have or have a loved one with cancer or a terminal sickness knows what I mean..But this worry like it or not we are stuck with, facing it head on.
So finding myself in a situation that most guys would run from and run fast, I understood that this may be the end of my new romance. The fun loving, carefree Julie that Joe started to fall for, quickly became sad, scared, and well lets just say not so "fun"anymore. Over night he found himself dealing with a heck of a lot more than he had ever bargained for. However, Joe didn't leave, he didn't go running... Joe didn't even blink an eye. But instead he held my hand, looked into my eyes and said this journey we are fighting together. And as much as I pushed him away and begged him to go, go and have a life that I may never be able to give him, he stood his ground. He made me a promise the day I found out that my cancer had spread, and though it was maybe the saddest day of my life, Joe made me find a bit of hope.

And on a Sunday morning in October 2011 almost a year from the day we met he kept his promise. He got down on bended knee and asked me the one question that I felt with all of my heart I was ready to answer without a single doubt in my mind.. Julie Ann Abramaitis will you marry me?

Joe you are and continue to be my light in all of my sorrow, you allow me to cry on your shoulder in the middle of the night, you allow me share my deepest and darkest fears and worries.. Joe you simply allow me to be me.. the new me! YOU are my gift from God and I love you with all that I have...